Divorce is a serious problem. It is something that affects a significant number of marriages. Fortunately, it is not entirely unavoidable. You can do something about it. As they say, an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure. Simply do a bit of sleuthing before heading off into the sunset and saying “I do.”
The best way to increase the odds of having a successful marriage is to make sure that you are marrying the right person for you, at the right time. As a family law attorney who has handled many divorce cases, I recognize a trend. One can trace most problems ending in divorce back to six areas: wealth/financial; children; physical and mental health; professional and personal growth; intimacy and loss of love; and finally, physical and emotional fear. You need to take a very close look at each of these areas. Try to see if you and your mate are on the same page in those areas.
To determine if both of you are compatible with each other in each of these aspects, you need to do a bit of detective work. It is not easy to do, but it is very much worth it. The time you invest now can save you a lot of pain, trouble, worries and money in the future. It can also save your marriage. You cannot do this in just a short period; so, do not rush it.
One way to determine your partner’s views regarding the six areas is simply to ask some questions. Do not directly ask what your mate’s views are regarding children, wealth, health or intimacy. Those are very general questions. You need to go into specifics. Do not give your partner a questionnaire, either. Instead, wait for a good time to ask each of these eight questions. I will discuss these questions in two upcoming posts, so stay tuned.
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